The I-Didn't-Want-To-Get-A-Hurt Discussion

"But I didn't want to get a huurrrt..."
"I know. I'm really sorry that you're hurting and upset... I hate to see you feeling down, Day."
"Then I think you shouldn't have taken me to that place and let those people give me this hurt..."
"You needed the blood test to find out what's going on with your body and why you're not feeling up to your usual self."
"I feel up to my usual self! I feel just fine!!"
"Well, your urine sample said otherwise and that's what warrented the bloodwork needing to be done."
"HEY! That's PRIVATE!! We don't need to be sharing this PRIVATE information, like, OUT LOUD!!!"
"I'm only trying to explain the reason for your little boo-boo, Day."
"LITTLE boo-boo??? What, are you makin' fun of me now?? That's nice, Mama... real thoughtful of you. Y'know, I was having a really nice day today... the sun was shining, I was having the most amazing dreams in my naps, the treats were finding me with perfect timing and even my little brother wasn't bugging me so much like usual. But then, you wrecked it all... just with that one little car ride that took me to that place I don't even like....."
"I'm sorry, Day... I didn't mean to wreck my Day by wrecking his day. Get it? Did you get what I did there?? ... Oh, come on, not even a teenie weenie little smile from that one?"
"Oh my gosh, you're sooooooo funny... ha... ha..... I hafta say, I'm a little disappointed that you're treating this like a joke."
"I promise I'm not, I was just trying to make you giggle."
"Whatever. Anyhow, I guess we won't be going back there again, huh? I mean, especially after the brightly bandaged damage they did to my arm... you, for sure, would never take me back there because you learned your lesson... at my expense, I might add! Right, Mama?"
"That's right, Day, we won't be going back there... not for another whole TWO weeks for your second blood test that will tell us if the medicine worked."
"Mamas are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Birthday Cake Discussion

"You made a cake? ..... Without me??"
"You were sleeping. You don't like to be interrupted when you're sleeping"
"But, you could have aaaasssked me... I love cake."
"I know you love cake, that's why I made it for you."
"You made it for ME???"
"I did."
"It's 'cause it's my birthday, isn't it?!! Sweeeet! Can I have it right now? Now?? How 'bout now???"
"Not right now, Day. All your people and your uncle, Derby, will be coming over tonight to share the cake with you."
"What?!!??? You JUST said you made it for me-eeeee! You didn't say you made it for EVERYONE!! I have a LOT of people, you know, and now I even have a brother who will HAVE to have some and, and, and... and have you seeeeen the size of Derby??? I'll be lucky if I even get to taste that cake, at aaaaall!"
"Trust me, Day, everything is better when you share. And, I will make sure that you have the cake slice of your dreams... this evening."
"But, I really want it nooowwww. It's the first time I'm ever turning six and I just really think that I deserve some cake... and some icinnnggggg..."
"And you'll have some. Tonight when everyone gets here."
"Mamas are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Canada Day Discussion

"But it's Canada Day..."
"I know it's Canada Day... and it's going to be a beautiful day, too!"
"But it looks beautiful right nowww..."
"You're right, it is, and it's also actually really beautiful to see you awake, y'know... before the crack of noon!"
"I'm only awake because I had plans, Mama! It's Canada Day!! I'm a Canadian, tooooo... and I was going to celebrate..... ALL... DAY.....LONG!!! And by 'celebrate'... I mean OUUUTSIIIIIIDDE celebrate! I was going to run outside and play outside and snack outside and have treats outside and I was even going to nap outside! ... All because I'm a Canadian... and now you won't let me celebrate....."
"Okay, Day, I think you're getting far too worked up here. You can do ALL of those things and I promise you that we are going to have a fantastically fun day today! All I said was we needed to wait a couple of hours for the grass to dry... It just is NOT safe for you to be running in the morning-dew soaked grass. You and Play run WAY too fast and risking a slip and fall that could really hurt you would just not make for a fun Canada Day, at all!"
"But I'm only worked up because I wanted to show my little brother about Canada Daaayyyy... he doesn't know yet and I wanted to show him earlyyy....."
"I think you're just up too early and still a little filled with the grumpies!"
"I'm not grumpy! I have my BANDANA ON!! ... That means I'm EXCITED about CANADA DAAYYY... NOT GRUMPY!!!"
"Yeaahhh... I think it's time for another little nap. Let's go... either right up here on the couch or your choice of your napping beds but you, Mister, need a few more hours of sleep before we begin again!"
"I'm keeping my bandana on..."
"Okay."
"I am kinda tired, Mama..."
"I know."
"I don't mean to be grumpy... I just really love Canada ... *yawn* ... Day....."
"I know, I love it, too... even more so, now that I get to share it with you and Play....."
"Happy Canada Day, Mama."
"Happy Canada Day, Day."

Spooky Camp-Story Time

The Nicely-Sharing Discussion

"No, but... um, I was here first, Mama..."

"Really, Day? Because, it looks to me like Play had to have been cuddled up in that bed first."
"No."
"So, why is he tucked in behind you and you're hanging half off the front? It kind of appears to me like you tried to push your way in, even though Play was already laying there."
"Ummmm..... well... but actually it was MY bed fi-iiiirrrsst..."
"Remember, we talked about how you would have to share your things when your new little brother came home?"
"I know... but... he already shared ALL my toys! And he shared ALL my treats!! And he shared ALL my space!!! And now he's sharing ALL my BEDDDSS??!!! ... It's not faaiiir!"
"I know it seems like way too many big changes, Day... but I promise you it will all get easier. You two are going to have the greatest of times together. You've been so gentle and patient in letting Play share in everything we all have to share. And trust me... he is only just starting on his own toy, treat and bed collections; I'm certain he will share with you just as you are sharing with him."
"How do you know he will?"
"Because that's what brothers do... and you've already taught him that by so graciously sharing your collections."

"Play, are you comfortable squished in there like that?"
"Well... um, I waaaas actually going to stretch out..... but, I guess it's okay if Day wants to share; it kinda feels like he wants to take the whole thing, though..."
"I think it might just take a little time for him to understand that sharing nicely makes everything even better."
"Iiiiiii'm sharing nicely, though... right, Mama? I'm a good sharer because I didn't say anything, at aaalllll when Day came and just pushed his way in here with me. I just stayed here and was really patient and really nicely sha-aarring... right, Mama??"
"That's right, Play. You are doing soooooo well in getting along with your new big brother and I'm soooooo incredibly proud of you!"

"Thanks-a-lot, Play! Nothin' like ratting me out....."
"Hey... don't mention it, Day! After all... isn't that what little brothers are for?" *wink*
"Little brothers are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Draftiness Discussion

"Ummm... hel-lo-ooooo???"
"Well, hello there!"
"Funny, Mama, but I wasn't actually saying 'hello'... Don't you notice something wrong here?"
"Hmmm... something maybe like the fact that it's already almost noon and you're still in in bed??"
"Yeah... ha...haaaa..... You're just full of funnies this morning... honestly, where do you keep coming up with them?" *eyeroll*
"Oh, I'dunno, could just be that I've been up for so many hours and it's been boring without your cheerful morning companionship; I had no other options but to just quietly sit alone and make up funnies to keep myself occupied."
"Well, you've had your fun, now could you at least try and be serious?!"
"Okay, I'll try."
"Well?"
"Well, what??"
"You really don't see it..."
"What, am I supposed to be a mind-reader? Just tell me already!"
"Myyyyyy ..... BUMMMMMMM!!!"
"Okay... now I'm detecting just a lil' bit of annoyance....."
"Mama! You know I like to be covered. And you know that I need to be cozy to have good sleepies. And you know that I only like to have my face and my tootsies out of the cozy covers... NOT my BUMMM! ... I don't like to have draftiness happening down there!!"
"Oh, I see. And so it's my fault you rolled and uncovered a tiny sliver your bum?"
"No, it's not your fa-auult... but, it is your jo-oobbb to make sure it gets re-covered quickly....."
"That's my job? Tell me, Day... how, in the world, did I get to be so lucky??!"
"Because I picked you to get to be my mama..."
"That, you did... and I'm just so grateful that you did."
"As you should be... Now, cover my bum and let me get back to sleep!!"
"Greyhounds are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Glamping Discussion

"Mama, what's 'glamping'?"
"What do you mean?"
"Jasper said I'm not camping, he said I'm gla-aaa-aampinggg... and he said it just like tha-aat!"
"Ohhhh... well, I think Jasper was just teasing you. Glamping is the same as camping but just usually done in fancier, comfier form, that's all; nothing to be bothered over."
"He calls this 'fancy'? I'm laying in a tent... what's fancy about that??!"
"Hey... you may be laying in a tent but it's not like you are exactly 'ruffing-it', Day... you do have a pretty cozy set-up."
"I guess... but I still don't like it when Jasper makes fun of me."
"Nobody likes to be made fun of. You and Jasper just have differing experiences and expectations of the great outdoors. But, you're still friends and that's the only thing that really matters."
"Maybe a tent-snack will help me feel better....."
"Good thing I have some treats right here in our packsack, then!"
"I didn't say tent-'treat'... I said, tent-'sna-aaack'... I'll have a pear please; in little-bite pieces..."
"Yeah... no 'glamping' happening here..."
"What was that??"
"Nothing! I'm just going to get your pear ready..."
"Thanks, Mama... Camping sure is FUN!!!"
"And Greyhounds are so unfair... grumble, grumble......"

The Handle-Bar-Head Discussion

"What'ths stho fthunny??"
"Just your silliness... You, my sweetie-plum, are quite a character!"
"Well... I r'lly don't apprecshciate the sthnickering, Mama..."
"But, you're just such a sight for sore eyes!"
"I know! ... Sthill doesthen't ansthwer my questhtion."
"I'm sorry, Day... but with that face, I just couldn't help it!"
"Hey! That'sth not very nicthe!"
"But, it's true..."
"Huh???"
"You have your whacky handle-bar-head silly face on... I thought you knew."
"Handle-bar-head? ... You thought I knew?? I STHTILL DON'T KNOW! ... What the heck are you evthen  thaaallking aboouuut!!!"
"Want me to get you a mirror?" *giggle*
"No. But, it would be nicthe if you didn't keep laughing at me when I'm justh trying to have a niceth sthleeeeeep..."
"Okay, Day, I'll leave you to have your 'niceth sthleep in peaceth'..."
"Mockin' me again? Boy... I'm stho glad I could offther you sthome amusthement..."
"That's why you're so awesome! Now, quick... picture for posthsterity!!!"
"Mamasth are stho unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Walk-Without-Balk Discussion

"Y'know, Mama... on second thought, it really doesn't look so nice out there... I think I'll just watch out the window instead."
"You're kidding... right?"
"No."
"But, all you have left to put on are your boots! And even more important than that... it's the first day in FIVE MONTHS that you don't need to get bundled in your full snowsuit; how exciting is that?!!"
"Yeah... so exciting....." *eyeroll*
"Did you just roll your eyes at me?"
"No." *head-turn* *eyeroll*
"And anyhow, it IS exciting! We finally have some mild temperatures happening, the roads are completely dry and we should be out there taking advantage of such a perfect afternoon!"
"There's still snow out there."
"Yes, but only on the yards."
"I don't like it."
"I know. But, at least we don't have to trudge through it any longer because our walking path is dry!"
"I'll just wait until all of the grass is back."
"That could take another month, Day."
"I'm a patient boy."
"Really? When did this come about?"
"Funny..."
"Seriously, Day, a short walk, that's all I'm asking... just one little thing."
"You're also going to ask me to put my boots on; that's two things..."
"Now you're being ridiculous."
"Or honest... I guess it's just in how you look at it."
"Okay Mister, here's what's about to be happening... boots are going on tootsies... booted-up tootsies are hitting the pavement... and over the snowless pavement, a walk-without-balk we shall have. Now, let's get a move on!"
Mamas are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Usual Walk-Time Discussion

"Okay, I need to set you down for a little while now, Day."
"No."
"Yes... I need a break."
"No."
"Seriously, I need a minute to catch my breath."
"FIIIINNNE! But, I'm not going to walk."
"Come on, Day, it's only a little way back to the car... I know you can do it."
"But I don't want to... so... I'm not going to and you can't make me!"
"Day..."
"I can't hear you because I'm closing my eyes and going to sleep now."
"Day, this is not sleepy time, it's walk time and you're about to join back in on the actual 'walking' part."
"Nope. I'm done... You knew I didn't want to come for a walk! I didn't want to walk... you knew I didn't want to walk, I told you I didn't want to walk! I'm supposed to be napping right now, not walkiinnng..... I said I didn't want to come and I meant I didn't want to come... but you made me come and now my boots are all dirty and it's all your faauuult!"
"Better your boots than your paws..."
"No, it's not! I like my boots, Dad!!"
"We'll wash your boots, Day, I promise... but will you please... just walk the last twenty-two feet back to the car??"
"Ummmmm, no."
"Greyhounds are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

April is National Adopt-A-Greyhound Month

Spread the word...

April is National Adopt-A-Greyhound Month

The Duvet-Fluffing Discussion

"What are you doooinngggg?!??"
"Whaaaaat???"
"I already had the sheets and duvet nicely fluffed and straightened... you knew I was just about to finish making the bed when the telephone rang!"
"But, you didn't make it fluffy enouuughh... I like it THIS FLUFFaaayyyy!"
"Well, I thank you for properly fluffing the duvet but, would you mind hopping on down so I can finish getting the bed made for the day?"
"What are you talking about?? It's already been made perfect... FOR... the DAY... BY ...the DAY! ..... See what I did there, Mama?" *wink-wink*
"I see what you did there... hilariously punny, Day, but you know what I meant."
"Relaaax, Mama, I'm just gonna lay here for a bit and take advantage of these sweet morning rays while I nap, then, when I get up, you can swoop in and work your bed-making magic before I get back up again for my afternoon nap."
"I'd really rather just get it over with now..."
"I know. And I'd like to be able to help you out... but..... I already worked really hard to bring my blankie up and we're kind of already settled in and comfortable now."
"Why don't you take your blankie over to your chaise instead? You'll probably have an even better nap without the sun so bright in your eyes."
"Good, so we're decided then... right now is MY time! Don't worry, Mama, I'll come and let you know when it's your turn, 'cause that's just how good I am at shaaaarinnggg..."
"Greyhounds are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The In-Disguise (sing-song) Discussion

"Okay, Day... final-layer time; let's get your outer jacket on and hit the trail!"

.....Day's not he-eerrre.....

"Come on, Day, we'll both enjoy getting out in the fresh morning air."

.....I'll just sit sti-iiiiill.....she'll neeeeeever fiiiiiiinnd meeeee.....
"Seriously Day, it's walk-time!"
.....I'm in disguiii-iiiiiise ...as a liiiittle fiiiiiishiieee...just swimmin' in the cabinet...with my wooden fishie frie-eeeends.....

"Day! We're going for a walk and it's going to be fun! Now, come on before you start getting too warm playing the ignore card."

.....if I'm too wa-aaaarm...then I won't need the final laaaaayerrr.....

"I'm not kidding, Day... we're going outside."

.....not if you can't seeeeeee meeeeeeeeeee...because I'm in disguiii-iiiiiise...as my red plaid pillll-ow.....

"You're seriously making me crazy! I can TOTALLY see you, Day!!"

.....not if I'm not looooooookinggg.....

"Okay, here's the deal, Mister: no walk... no 'YAAAYYYY, we went for a walk' treats....."

"Mamas are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Backhoe Loader Discussion

"Mama! ... MAAMAAAAA!!"
"What is it? What's wrong???"
"Mama... what iiiiiis that??"
"Where? Oh... do you mean that machine outside?"
"A 'machiiinne'... it's soooo cooooool....."
"It is a machine, Day, but it's actually called a Backhoe Loader. You're right though, it is pretty cool."
"Whoooaah... Backhoe Loaderrr..... SO cool! But... why is there a man stuck inside of it?"
"Oh, he's not 'stuck' in there, Day, he's working in there, he's directing the backhoe with its controls to get the work done."
"He's so lucky! I really wanta do that, Mama, I wanta be a Backhoe Loader DI-RECTORRR!!!"
"I thought you were loving the retired-life, why would you possibly want to go back to work now, at this comfy and sleepy stage in your life?"
"You don't think I can do it."
"It's not that..."
"Just because I don't have thumbs??"
"More like because you don't have a license."
"So, you DON'T think I can do it!"
"Of course I think you can do it, Day; I know you can do anything that you put your mind to."
"Way to patronize your only son... Y'know, you should really think about writing a parenting book....."
"Maybe I will... and maybe I'll entitle the first chapter 'GROUNDED... due to Backhoe Loaded SASS!'......."
"Mamas are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Bum-Lifter Discussion

"But, I want my bum-lifter..."
"I know. But, I also know that you're completely capable of being your own bum-lifter."
"But, I like it when you're my bum-lifter, Mama....."
"You're a big boy, Day, you can do it... just lift your inside leg onto the edge of the couch and then shift your hips up and back... easy-peasy, Dude!"
"No, thank you."
"What do you mean 'no, thank you'? It wasn't an invitation, it was an explanation of what needs to be done... by you... to achieve your desired result."
"It's okay; I'll just wait until you're ready."
"Actually, I wasn't planning on getting ready."
"Sure you were... you were getting ready to come over here and sit down beside me, lift my bum, cover me up with my blankie and then you were going to sit and cuddle me while I have my nap. Don't you remember? That's what we do."
"So, you're basically saying that I'm here merely for your ease of comfort?"
"No, not just for my comfort... for my company, too!"
"Nice."
"I know I'm nice, aannndddd helpful..... 'cause I'm helping you so you feel needed!"
"Oh, I feel needed, all right..."
"That's great! ... Now c'mon and let's make this happen!!"
"Fine... *sigh* ... just let me finish getting my tea ready."
"Okay... but, first I'll be needing my BUM-LIFTER!!!"
"Greyhounds are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Back-to-Bed Discussion

"Gooooooood MORNING, Smunchkinnnnnnn!!!!!!!!!"
"I want to go back to bed."
"But, it's morning!"
"I don't like morning."
"But, we just got up!"
"No, yoouuu... just got up!"
"Well, I'd actually say we both got up because we're both out here in the living room and I don't remember carrying you in here..."
"Real funny, Mama."
"I didn't mean it to be funny, Day... it's just the truth."
"Well, I only came out here because you came out here even though you knowww that I like to have company when I'm still sleeeeeping. I don't think that was very nice of you to leave me there in the bedroom all by myself....."
"It's already seven-thirty in the morning; any longer in bed and half the day would already be wasted, Dude!"
"You say wasted... I say enjoyyyyyyed....."
"Oh c'mon, Day, the sun is shining... the day is fresh and ready to be appreciated!"
"I say we take a vote and the vote is already proving set at two against one!"
"Two against one? How do you figure that??"
"Poor Horsey CLEARLY looks about as ready for this annoying sunshine as I am... I mean, just looooook at him, Mama... poor guy looks stunned..... and painfully so!"
"I think he just must be flabbergasted at your grumpy-morning attitude."
"I think he wants to go back to bed."
"Well, I guess that's a bummer for him then, 'cause my coffee is made, my crackers are cream-cheesed, my book is open and my morning has begun... all with a big ol' smile, as every morning deserves to be greeted!"
"Cream-cheesed crackers, you say??"
"Going back to bed, you said??"
"Mamas are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The All-For-One Discussion

"Dude, did you hear that?"
"Yeah, I heard, Day; looks like it's not gonna be the lucky day you had in store, after all..."
"SSHHHHH... Snowmaaaann..... whisperrrrrrrrr!!!"
"Sorry, Day, I didn't know it was a secret..."
"Well, of course it's a secret! You heard what I heard and you should know by now that it means we're in hiding... QUICK... close your eyes..... It's all-for-one, we're sleepin' and nothin' can wake us!!"
"But, Day..."
"No 'buts'... just do it! Close your eyes, close your eyes NOW!"
"Day, I can't!"
"Yes, you can!"
"Day! I don't have EYYYELIDDDDSS, DUUUUDE!!!!!"
"Oh....."
"Quick, Day... your mama's comin' in here..... what'do I do? What'do I dooooo??"
"Uuummmmm... start snoring!!"
"What??? I don't snore!"
"You do now! I am NOT getting dressed in a MILLION clothes  and going outside into the white-cold FREEZINGNESS for that embarrassing torture Mama calls a 'walk'! Now, start snorin' and make sure it's LOUUDDD... don't you dare blow this for me, Snowman!!!"
"FIIIIIINE! But I think you're RIDICULOUS and TOTALLY OVERREACTING about your mama wanting to take you out for a nice little walk of togetherness!"
"If you think it sounds so nice, maybe you should go on the walk!"
"Maybe you should be not-so-bossy to me..."
"I'm not bossy... I'm desperate!"
"Okay, okaayyy... here goes..... *yawwnnn-whistle-z-z-z-z-zzzz*"
"Really??... Could you at least trryyy to make it seem natural? We're going for buy-worthy here, not over-the-top, Snowman!"
"I'm telling you, Day... one more snarky review and I am so selling you out!!"
"Do it right and I won't have to give you snarky reviews!"
"Don't say I didn't warn you..... Oh, hi there, Day's Mama! Day and I were juuuuust laying here talking about you... he is SO excited that you want to take him outside for a walk and he is just itchin' to get into his snowsuit layers and get outside for some fresh air!!!"
"WHAT? Wait! No... I didn't... *sigghhh*... snowmen are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Wooly-Mess Discussion

"Daaayyyy... what the heck happened in here?? I left the room for THIRTY SECONDS!!!"
"Whaaaaat??! You LEFT! I got lonely... I needed company!!"
"And the knitting project I'm working on took my place??"
"Well, um... it was warm and soft and squishy like your cuddles, soooooo..... yeah, I guess it kinda did."
"Take a look at the mess here, Day... it hardly looks like you were merely 'cuddling' with the wool."
"Well, but it started that way..."
"Do pray tell."
"Welllll..... I looked up and you were gone and there I was..... aalll alo-onnnnne. And then I looked up on the couch and saw that you'd also left that poor yet delightful wool-squishiness all alone, too; that's when I knew that we were both in the loneliness together and I thought I should fix it for us both."
"By destroying it."
"Not destroying... plaaayy-innggg....."
"That wool is for making a blanket with, Day, not for playing with!"
"YOU got to play with it..."
"I wasn't playing with the wool, I was knitting with it..."
"Do we really need to stand here and argue semantics, Mama? Seriously... haven't we already wasted enough of our precious cuddle time on this trivial issue?!"
"Trivial issue?? It'll take me hours to untangle and roll this wooly-mess into a new, useable ball for knitting with!"
"Reelaaaxxx, Mama... I'll help you... I mean, hey, if I could make this much beautiful art on only my very first try, just imagine what I'll be able to do with a little more practice!"
"The only practice you'll be getting, Day, is in cleaning up!"
"That's not fun..."
"But that's what's happening... start cleaning, Mister!"
"Mamas are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Holdin'-Paws Discussion

"I'm just going to lay here and hold paws with you until you feel aaaall better, Mama."
"Ohhh... that's so sweet of you, Day!"
"I know."
"I just have one teeeeeenie little request though..."
"Which is??"
"Well, do you see how your toe is pushing my toe waaayy over?"
"Yup."
"It's kind of uncomfortable..."
"No, it's not."
"It really kinda is."
"No, see... it neeeeeeds to be like that..... we're holdin' paws and it's makin' you better! I mean, how else are you going to get all healed up if our paws aren't locked tight enough for me to give you all of my awesome healingness??"
"Well-wishes would probably work just as well."
"Too late, Mama, we're already settled and locked-in for the long haul!"
"And I wouldn't want it any other way, Day... holding paws with you just fills up my whole heart."
"I know."
"And, you really are the sweetest, most caring and full-of-love boy a mama could hope for."
"I know... but, I think you also meant to say 'incredibly and BEYOND handsome'..."
"Greyhounds are so unbelieveably modest... *eyeroll, headshake*....."

The Tasty-Spoon Discussion

"I just checked on you... you were sound, sound asleep."
"Well, um... I waaaas sleeping... but..... then I thought I heard a spoon tap-tap-tapping against the side of a container???"
"You did?"
"I thought I did."
"Could be because I just tapped the excess sour cream off of this spoon for the dip I'm making..."
"SOUR CREEAAM?? But... I love sour cream....."
"I know you do."
"Wait a minute! Were you even going to tell me there was a sour cream spoon to be had?"
"Of course I was going to tell you there was a sour cream spoon to be had."
"Sounds a little fishy, Mama... you just said you checked that I was sleeping and it had to be before you were holding the sour cream spoon or I would've smelled the deliciousness when you came to look in on me. I think you were checking to make sure I was asleep. I think you maybe thought that I was so asleep that I wouldn't know there even was a missed spoon..."
"Day... do I not always offer you the spoon??"
"Usu'lly. Guess I really don't know, for sure, though... you could have pulled this stunt before when maybe I really did sleep through a tasty-spoon opportunity..."
"I promise you, I have NEVER cheated you of a tasty-spoon!"
"So you saayyy....."
"Day! Do you want the sour cream spoon, or not?"
"Well, of course I want the sour cream spoon! I want EVERY sour cream spoon!! Even SOUR CREAM would want the sour cream spoon!!!"
"Here... it's aaaalll yours. Enjoy!"
"I'd enjoy it more with an extra dunk... y'know... to make up for the uncalled-for betrayal of trust....."
"Greyhounds are so unfair... dunk, dunk....."

The Snugga-Bugga-Boo Discussion

"Mama?"
"Um-hmm?"
"How come you always call me your lil' snugga-bugga-boo?"
"Well, I suppose it's because you're  just so huggy and cuddly and you love being tucked-in tight, tight, tight like a cute lil' burrito in your blankets... My boooootiful-bug-tucked-all-in-snug... so, I just can't help myself 'cause you're my lil' snugga-bugga-boooooo."
"It's kinda embarrassing..."
"I'm not embarrassed!"
"No, it's embarrassing for meeee... 'cause you say it in front of my friends and they call me 'a mamas boy'.....
"That's okay, you are a mamas boy... you're THIS incredibly proud mamas boy!"
"They don't mean it like that..."
"What should it matter what anybody else thinks?"
"I dunno... I guess it doesn't, actually....."
"So, I can still call you my lil' snugga-bugga-boo, then??"
"I guess..."
"Really??"
"Yes."
"I'm so glad!"
"But... just not in front of my friends..... okay, Mama?"
*sigh* "Okaaay..."
"Or, out loud..."
"Greyhounds are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Speediness Discussion

"Umm... Uncle Day? I thought you were supposed to be some kind of speed racer, or something... doesn't that mean you should maybe, I dunno, have some speediness going on??"
"I am... but, my specialty is in sprinting... I need to pace myself for these long walks."
"But you told me you're a professional athlete, doesn't that mean... like... you should be in shaapppe??"
"I am in shape, Derby... for SPRINTiiinng! And anyhow, we've been over this... I'm RETIRED!"
"So, retired means you can just let yourself go?"
"Look who's talking..."
"Hey! I'm not chubby, okay; it's all fur!!!"
"Whatever."
"Well, I'm still ahead of you, so I wonder what that says on the topic?"
"It says you can thank your extend-a-leash for that one, Derby, 'cause I'm not allowed to have one, but if I was... I can guarantee you I'd be in the lead."
"I think it says I'm FASTERRR!"
"Yeah? Well. You wouldn't be moving so fast either, if you had to wear all the extra clothes that I have to wear... this stuff weighs as much as I do; it's a workout just to leave the house!"
"Excuses, excuses....."
"No excuses... just facts."
"Yeah, but the only fact actually in-play right now, is that I'm ahead of you... which means... Iiiiii'm FASTERRR!!!"
"Nephews are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."

The Bed-Stealing Discussion

"So, um... Da-aayyy...."
"What's up, Mama?"
"Just wondering if you have any idea of why Dad's pillows, along with one of the extra blankets, are on your chaise?"
"Actually... I was just about to ask you the same thing... that's SO weird!"
"So you know nothing, then?"
"Nope. Guess Dad must have just decided to sleep over there instead of here... good thing I'm as comfortable here on your bed as I am on my chaise, which heeee took over, so you wouldn't feel lonely, huh Mama?!"
"I think there might be more to the story than you're telling me because I know, for fact, that we tucked you into your own chaise last night... Did you maybe wake up in the night to get a drink, or to make a bathroom run?"
"Welllll, I did have to go to the bathroom at three o'clock buuuut... I got Dad up to take me so you could sleep! That was thoughtful of me, right??"
"Totally."
"You're welcome!"
"Still doesn't explain why you slept up here and it appears your dad slept over there..."
"Well... I just thought I should be thoughtful to Dad, too... y'know, like I was thoughtful to you....."
"So, it was 'thoughtful' to take his spot?"
"No, not 'take'... waaaarrm... I was warming Dad's spot for him."
"So, what happened?"
"Ummm... he took too long?"
"Are you asking me?"
"No. He definitely took too long! I mean, how long does it take to lock a door and set an alarm that's like TWELVE steps away from the beeedddd???"
"So, you fell asleep while 'warming' and left no room on the bed for Dad."
"How should I know what happened next? You JUST said it... I was asleeeeep by then!!!"
"You're going to take no responsibility, at all... are you?"
"Why would I take any responsibility?? Look at my chaise! I didn't put that mess there... so, why should IIIiiiiii have to sleep in it??!"
"Not an ounce of remorse either, I see?"
"Remorse?? Hey... if that chaise is good enough for me then it's good enough for Dad!"
"Greyhounds are so unreasonable... grumble, grumble....."

The New Year Discussion

"Well, if that isn't a face lost in some deep thoughts! What's got you so down, Day?"
"I liked my Old Year..."
"I did, too. We had a whole year of incredibleness, didn't we?"
"Yeah... and that's why I'm sad..... I just didn't want it to end."
"Well, try not to think of it as an ending and try instead to think of it as a fresh new beginning of the awesomeness still ahead for us in 2015!"
"Do you really think it'll be okay, Mama?"
"I know it'll be better than okay, Day."
"How do you know?"
"I know because we're going into this exciting New Year together and because we're always here for each other... and especially because every single day of every single year I love you even more... A whole brand new year of all of these things having even more time to grow, what could be happier New-Yearwise than that??!"
"I guess so... but, we're still going to do all our favourite stuff from last year, right Mama? Like snacks and plays and lots and lots of cuddles....."
"I promise you all the snacks and plays and cuddles you can stand, Day... all the walks, too!"
"Walks? Actually... that's one part of 2014 I wouldn't miiinnd doing away with; we could add in some extra sleepy-time instead... How 'bout we make that our first resolution?! Oh, this is going to be a FANTASTIC New Year, now!"
"Sweet attempt, Day... but walks are staying on the schedule for 2015."
"Man! Even in the New Year mamas are so unfair... grumble, grumble....."